Monday, December 29, 2014


I have never used the service of a prostitute and I am not planning to. I still say that if 2 adults agree to do something in a bedroom they should be able to do it without other people judging them. No matter if money is involved or not.

Why do women say that strippers are just being manipulated by evil men when they themselves line up when Chippendale come to town or male strippers come to the goose parties. Double standards?

Thursday, December 25, 2014


"I like the voices in my head arguing, it distracts them, and I can do what I want in the meantime......."

Be yourself.

"The pursuit of normality is the ultimate sacrifice of potential" Faith Jegede

Monday, December 15, 2014

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Friday, October 24, 2014

Artificial Intelligence.

AI or Artificial Intelligence. It does not exist. The closest thing we have is Apparent Intelligence, which I would like to call obvious stupidity or OS. 

Right or wrong.

"Make yourself right, never mind them". Pop song.

Monday, October 20, 2014

Men are stupid, women are crazy.

"All you have to know about men and women is that women are crazy and men are stupid. The main reason women are crazy, is that men are stupid." George Carlin.

Chain mail.

"The guard was wearing chain mail, full of holes." Terry Pratchett.


Stop using money you don't have, to buy things you don't need, to impress people you don't like.

One horsepower.

There are two horses, one runs faster than the other. Which one is one horsepower?

The sun and the flower

You give a flower sun, it opens up. You smother it, it dies.

Sunday, September 21, 2014


Genius has it's limitations. No such limitations have, so far, been discovered for stupidity.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Women leaving.

Women always leave me. I don't mind them leaving, but they always have to tell me why.


Things wouldn't be the same if things were different.
When you look at things differently they change.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Monday, September 8, 2014

Zen from Life.

Even as we exhale, it is inhaled by others.
The light that shines upon me, shines upon my neighbour as well.
In this way, everything is connected to everything else.
In this way, I am connected to my friend even as I am connected to my enemy.
In this way, there is no difference between me, and my friend.
In this way, there is no difference between me, and my enemy.
We are none of us alone.


I was born early in life and aged rapidly as I got older.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014


Too big ego is not good, It's even worse when it has absolutely no basis in fact.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014


"True love is doing something for someone, not caring if they find out or not."

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Some people.

Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

Thirst for Knowledge.

The thirst for knowledge has its rewards . "A new research made at the Granada University points that after a game of football or rugby, a beer is more efficient in rehydrating the body than water.
Alcohol may be linked to cancer and other diseases but the carbohydrates, salts and bubbles that are found in beer could make fluids' absorption much easier."
"Not to mention beer is a package of vitamins and minerals coming from barley, hops and yeast." The rehydration effect in the students who were given beer was "slightly better" than among those given only water." said lead researcher Professor Manuel Garzon, of Granada's medical faculty."The carbon dioxide in beer helps quench the thirst more quickly, while beer's carbohydrates replace calories lost during physical exertion.""

Centaurs organs.

I've never thought about this before but now I wonder where would a Centaurs internal organs be, the heart and stomach? In the human chest or the horse chest?

Sound barrier.

I wonder who fixes the sound barriers each time their broken. It must be lousy job, knowing that as soon as you fix it, someone will come along and break it again.


Please put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. My wish for this year is that people will understand that being eaten by dragons is not something to be ashamed of. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and are truly terrifying. 93% won't copy and paste this... they have been eaten by dragons!

Saturday, July 26, 2014


At our hardware design headquarters, research has been proceeding to develop new ultimate lines of highly sophisticated smart products that establish not only new standards for quality, technological leadership, and operating excellence but also highly surpass all previous customer expectations. With customer success as our primary focus, work has been proceeding at highest rate on redeveloping the conceived idea of an hardware design that would not only provide inverse reactive method for use in unilateral phase translation methods, as Nikolai Tesla successfully demostrated, but more importantly would also be capable of automatically synchronising those important hardware parameters with the user first design principle. Using such highly sophisticated devices as refractive imagineering optical conceiving modulation modification monitors, energy efficient paradigm shifting processing modules and cooling the whole system with panametric fan equipped with two micro spurving bearings in a direct perpendicular line with the axial forces that totally eliminate side fumbling of the axial geometry. Moreover, whenever fluorescent optical radiation motion is required, it is now employed in conjunction with the drawn reciprocation radical arm, to reduce sinusoidal deceleration. The new product is designed to be highly efficient, to make the production of the improved equipment faster and more environmentally friendly while still maintaing the essential vault like structural characteristics of earlier generations and ultimately making sure we can provide clean & sustainable future for our children.

All of these new hardware designs are equipped with highly modified standard company specific software. Redeveloped to the highest possible standards to function without undue delays and create seamless experience with the end user produced by the modial interaction of magneto reluctance and capacitive duractance made possible only by the new imaginative use of pre-famulated amulite surmounted by a malleable logarithmic design with customisable analytic platform foundation, making service of the whole system infinitely easier and faster.

Fuel Storage

I'm starting to see a pattern in these movies. If some building is marked "Fuel Storage", it will blow up.

Best actor

In your opinion, who is the better actor. Homer Simpson or Fred Flintstone? It is on TV. Everything on TV is acting. Even reality TV.


They say you should always wear clean underwear in case you have an accident. But if you get frightened before the accident it may not be clean anymore.


Red or white wine with pizza, of course, depends on what's on the top. But should I use red or white candle? Color of the candle depends, of course, on a) the season and b) the company. Now the problem is; what color of napkins, tablecloth and music?

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Living together

I find that when man and woman start living together she will immediately try to improve him. She'll start by getting rid of the stuff he likes; the comfortable slightly worn clothes, the old furniture. Then she will take him to purchase replacements (that he, of course, has to pay for). He will have to slave from dawn till dusk to "help" her improve the home, paint the house and move the furniture back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Then he has to go out and make money to purchase her "improvements" and modifications. In the end he will learn to appreciate the garage because that is about the only place in the home where he can be in peace. That is until the wife sells the garage because "it is never really used". :)

My fair lady

"I find that the moment I let a woman make friends with me, she becomes jealous, exacting, suspicious, and a damned nuisance. I find that the moment I let myself make friends with a woman, I become selfish and tyrannical. Women upset everything. When you let them into your life, you find that the woman is driving at one thing and you’re driving at another." 
From the movie.

Saturday, June 21, 2014


Without struggle you don't find strength. So stop whining about how tough your life is and do something about it.

Sunday, May 11, 2014


The great thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from. 

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Cats and Dogs

Why do men prefer dogs and women prefer cats?
Well the root of that preference comes from the days when men where hunter gatherers or labouring in the fields while women were at home, either pregnant or taking care of the little babies. The dogs went out with the men to hunt while the cats were at home, keeping vermin like rats or mice down to manageable levels.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Saturday, April 5, 2014


The key to failure is to do what's expected of you.

Minced meat

The minced meat here is of such a low quality that I'm starting to wonder what happens to the edible parts of the cow.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Dead plants.

It's strange that some women don't want to be given cut flowers because they (the flowers) are dead. The same women buy a Christmas tree and then throw it away.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Buying or renting a property?

In todays apartment/housing market there are many people who tell you it is more economical for you to rent an property than to buy it. They say that instead of tying your money in a property you should invest the money and build it up so that in the end your investment will pay for the rent. They are right, and wrong.

If you buy property?
     Negative points: You'll have to pay purchase fees, maintenance and property taxes. Your property might lose it's value proportionally or fully. If serial killer moves into next apartment/house, if the local supermarket, school or the largest employer in the neighbourhood closes, your property will lose some of it's value. Depending on your mortgage you might be stuck in a property that you hate and eats all your income. Defaulting on your mortgage payments because your property is worth less than the mortgage and letting the bank take the property will get you into deeper trouble. You'll still owe the bank the difference, plus all costs, only now the bank wants it all in one sum instead of monthly payments. If hurricane or tsunami destroy your property and you have little or no insurance you might find yourself homeless but deep in dept. Property ties you down, you might have to refuse good job offer because you can't sell your property fast enough.
     Positive points: The value of the property might rise. New highly paid job opportunities close by might make the value skyrocket. Regular payments of a mortgage usually go down as you slowly pay down the capital dept. Once your property is dept free, your salary is all yours.

If you lease property?
     Positive points: You only have to pay regular monthly payment (plus maybe small finders fee) and no matter what happens to the property you can always leave with few months, even weeks, notice.
     Negative points: Rent always rises. Some landlords of rented properties do not like you to make changes to the property to fit your tastes or needs, others do not maintain the property properly. The landlord might decide to sell the property or for other reasons kick you out. In todays highly volatile stock market you are much more likely to lose all your investments than to lose your property.

A lot depends on your age. I would say that no later than by the time you're 35 years old you should have bought a property with the aim of owning it outright by the time you're 55-60 years old. You do not want to log into your investment portfolio when you are 60 years old to find your investments worthless while you're living in high rent property or your mortgage is higher than the property value.
The crossover point of purchasing property being cheaper than renting is usually somewhere between 4-8 years. After 35 you are much less likely to move than before 35.

Lower taxes by living in a cheaper property further away from city centers (which incidentally also lowers your mortgage). Spend wisely on maintenance. 

Monday, March 3, 2014

Better place

The world would be a better place if people knew half as much about what food and exercise is good for them as they know about what drug is numbs the pain of living with their selves.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Training electrons.

I want to train electrons so computers can use electrons for calculations instead of current method of shovelling electrons down a conducting path. Just imagine an electron taking a certain path over a conductor, basically creating a circuit in every conducting material, instead of flow of groups of electrons through predetermined conducting paths and components. :)

Saturday, January 18, 2014

How to have more money.

Warning. Saving too much money will cost you your friends. Having too much money will get you some friends but they'll leave when the money runs out.

1. Make a detailed list so you know what you are spending your money on. Track your progress so you know how you are doing in adjusting expenses.

2. Make a budget by going through that list and separate what you need from what you like or want. Need = shelter, food, clothing, transport. Like/Want = large house, exotic foods, designer clothing, nice new car, great stereo. Allocate your salary to necessary items and eliminate the want items.

3. Create emergency fund so you can meet unexpected expenses like broken fridge or washing machine (but see nr. 10). (Money you keep in a account is not emergency fund if you owe the same amount, or more, somewhere else.)

4. Start paying up loans, starting with the loans that you pay the highest interest on.

5. Don't use credit cards or overdraft on your bank account. Don't travel if you have to use credit card to pay the trip. If you can't pay it when you order, you can't afford it.

6. Get rid of the car (or one or of the cars from the home) and use public transport or bicycle or your feet or get slower, cheaper car. Don't buy a gas guzzling car to make you feel safe in, drive safely.

7. Don't eat out, order in food or get take-away food more than once or twice a month. Don't go out regularly with your friends to pubs, coffee shops or similar expensive places. Meet at each others house in rotation. Plan your meals in advance, plan them around what is available in your freezer/fridge, aim to empty your freezer of everything more than a month old, fridge more than a week old. Use coupons at the supermarket.

8. Cut regular costs. Shop around for deals on regular cost items. Stop smoking if you smoke. Stop drinking alcohol if you drink it. Cut cable or get the cheapest option, get slower internet, lease cheaper mobile phone, reduce insurance coverage (self insure, especially if you have older worn out things and your insurance carrier has lots of small print that can reduce or prevent payout in case of you needing insurance). Cut the gym and go out jogging. Pack a lunch for work.

9. Buy things that last and take care of the things you have. Wax your car, paint your house, don't drink or eat in the sofa or over the carpet. Don't be sloppy and leave your things where they can be damaged. Don't let your kids leave their toys/things outside.

10. "Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without." Don't replace things just because some new things are available or they develop minor failures. Always try to repair them first. Don't replace your oven because you burned some food in it. Don't replace your TV because there is a new one with a 3D option. Repair your children's bicycles instead of buying new ones. Fix clothing, sew up small rips, replace zippers, glue shoes that are starting to come apart. When clothes are finally worn out they are good for rags. There are videos on YouTube teaching you how to do all those things.

How to make cup of instant coffee.

Warning. Coffee is a stimulant, drinking too much coffee can lead to difficulties sleeping, short temper and other mood swings. Drinking coffee does not make person an asshole, that is a previously acquired condition.

Items needed: Boiled water, jar or pack instant coffee powder or granules, container, spoon, mixing utensil and a cup.
Optional items: Milk, Sugar, Syrup.

1. Follow my earlier tutorial on how to boil water ( to get boiled water in a container. (It has been brought to my attention that modern technology has brought us a thing called Electric Kettle which can also be used to make boiled water. Feel free to use that method if desired. If needed I can write instructions on how to use Electric Kettle)

2. Pour the boiled water into the cup until it is about 3/4 full (or 1/4 empty if you prefer that type of measurements).

3. Open the instant coffee powder/granules jar and use the spoon to measure quantity of powder/granules into the cup. The instant coffee powder/granules jar should have recommendations of base mixture on the label. If the jar has no recommendations of base mixture, put in one spoonful of instant coffee powder/granules in to the cup, follow step number 4 and taste the results. If you find the results taste weak add half a spoonful of instant coffee powder/granules to the cup, follow step number 4 and taste the results. Repeat until you are satisfied with the taste. Please write the number of spoonfuls you have used to reach satisfying taste on the outside of the instant coffee powder/granules jar for later use.
If your instant coffee powder/granules come from a pack, you usually use one pack per cup. Please read the instructions on the pack to make sure that that is correct.
Feel free to vary the mixture to suit your taste.

4. Using the mixing utensils, stir the boiled water in the cup so the coffee powder mixes with the water. The spoon can be used for that operation.

5. Add Milk, Sugar and/or other optional items to the cup until the instant coffee in the cup suit your taste.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

I'm blessed.

Blessed are the ignorant for they believe themselves to be right. At least that's what I believe.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

How to put on socks

Warning. Although there are exception, the general rule is that socks come in matched pairs and are usually gender specific. They are not left or right specific, either sock of the pair can work on either leg of the person. Socks for males are usually bigger, thicker, coarser, plainer and longer lasting than socks for females, aside from being about one third of the price and they never go out of fashion (no wonder females are always complaining about low salary when they waste their money like that, without any sense whatsoever). Some people like to "cross-dress" with socks and wear socks made for the other sex. They usually claim it's more comfortable. Although some narrow-minded people frown at that, there is nothing wrong or sinful with sock cross-dressing.

Socks have three distinctive features.

1. A hole in one end. This is where your feet go into the sock.

2. On the opposite end of the sock there should not be a hole. This is where your toes will be located when the sock is on your feet.

3. A outward pointing "kink" close to the centre of the sock. This is called Heel and is where your heel will be when the sock is on your feet.

How to put on socks.

1. Find pair of socks that are the right size for your feet. (Note, it is desirable that socks are clean when you put them on the feet. If you cannot find clean socks ask your wife or mother.) After your wife (or mother) have told you where the clean socks are located, select a pair whose colouring and texture fit the occasion.

2. Your wife (or mother) have usually done this before washing the socks for you, but inspect them for holes. There should be one hole, located at one end (where, as  previously mentioned, your foot goes into the sock) in each sock. If there are more holes, especially around the toes and heels, the socks are worn out and need to be replaced at first opportunity.

3. Find the outside of the sock. The female who is in charge of the household has usually done this for you but make sure that the outside of the sock does in fact turn out. Usually the inside is rougher and has a seam near the toe, this seam should point in. If the socks are inside out, put your hand through the hole in the end, grab the toe part and pull the toe part through the hole at the end.

4. Grab sock with both hands, put both thumbs inside the hole and bunch the sock up between your fingers until your thumbs touch the toe part from the inside (the heel part of the sock should point down or to your feet, not up or to your face, while you´re doing this). Insert foot into hole so that your toes touch the toe part of the sock.

5. Hold the socks loosely and pull them as far up the foot as they comfortably go, stretching the material enough so that the socks cover your feet without any wrinkles. Take especial care when stretching the socks over your heels to ensure comfortable fit.

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

How to make boiling water.

Warning: Boiling water is highly technical process that should only be attempted by specially trained adults, for example your wife (or your mom if you don't have a wife). Boiling water is hot and can cause severe burns and can even be fatal if inhaled. Do not drink boiling water. Also make sure you follow all ESD precautions (aren't you proud Jos?).

To make boiling water you need a powerful source of radiating thermal energy (heat) for example a stove or a big fire (but do not set the stove (or the house, the wife or anything else "valuable" on fire). You also need a container that is water and heat proof (a metal pot without an hole in the bottom is an excellent choice). Last, but not least, you'll need water.

1. Put water into container and make sure that it does not leak out again.
2. Put the container on or close to the heat source.
3. Make sure that the heat source is radiating thermal energy (in other word turn the stove on or light the fire).
4. Watch the water for signs of boiling (this may take some time). First sign of approaching boiling water is a steam that rises from the surface of the water. Second sign is small air bubbles in the water in the part of the waterproof container that is closest to the radiating thermal energy source. The goal of boiling water is reached if large air bubbles burst continuously to the surface of the water.
5. Now you have boiling water. What you do with it is only limited by your imagination. You could make coffee, tea, soup or almost any kind of meal that does not have the words "grilled" or "fried" in it.

Please note the difference between "boiling water" and "boiled water". Boiled water is water that was turned into a boiling water but is not boiling anymore due to proportional reduction or disappearance of radiating thermal energy source.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

How to nail a nail into wood.

First a warning. Do not confuse nails with fingernails. Nails are made of metal and are not stuck to your fingers. Hitting nails with hammer does not cause pain, hitting fingernails does.
1. In one hand grab nail between fingertips.
2. Press the pointy end towards the wood and the flat end towards you.
3. Using the other hand, grab the hammer by the handle.
4. Swing the hammer firmly and accurately, causing the flat part of the hammer head to hit directly onto the flat end of the nail.
5. Repeat until nail is stuck to wood.
6. Stop grabbing the nail between fingertips and move the hand away from the nail.
7. Keep on swinging the hammer in the other hand and hitting the flat end of the nail until it has reached desired depth.
8. Stop swinging the hammer.
9. Repeat steps 1 to 8 until desired number of nails has been nailed to the wood.